ste_noni | (no subject)

After my post of frustration yesterday, I googled "albuquerque birth center" (since that's where my parents live) and the first link was to an awesome looking/sounding birth center where the midwives will either come to you, or you can use their birth center. And they take insurance. I just wanted to cry because it sounds exactly like what I want.

But if I go that route, it almost guarantees Joe won't be there. I suspect that would be fine with him (he's not home and we haven't talked much since he's pretty busy on his trip), but I know what an amazing experience it was and I think he would want to be there if he knew. But he's wanted our baby born outside Puerto Rico from the beginning.

The whole thing just makes me mad. I have two health insurance plans, both of which are pretty good. I should be able to find a situation in which I can be comfortable and have my baby and yet have a safe back-up option if necessary. Territory or not, I'm still in the US. When I'm the most frustrated, I just imagine bending over, having them do the epidural, and just have the baby their way. And I could accept that, but then I have to put up with 2-3 days in a substandard hospital with limited visiting hours and limited access to my baby and no 3rd party (husband or someone else) who can stick around and be my advocate. Three days away from Ellie when she could be bonding with the baby seems so wrong.

I need to talk to Joe, I guess. I suspect he will be all for me going to stay with my parents for a few weeks and will do his best to fly out as soon as I'm in labor. As for him missing the birth, I guess we will just have to have a 3rd baby so he can hopefully be there for that one.

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Oh, honey. This is so hard. And, it shouldn't be this hard...

Will they let you fly, that close to your due date? If they will, then yeah, sounds like it might be the best plan.

I wish this wasn't so frustrating for you (and all the women in PR)! The words, "substandard hospital" would scare the bejesus out of me on so many levels, so it really does sound like flying back to the mainland is the best plan. I suspect that Joe isn't thinking of this as a decision about whether or not he'll be there for the birth, but more where you and Baby will have the best care.

I need to check into that again. When I went to my law school graduation, I was 36 weeks pregnant. I seem to remember that each airline had a different rule - some of which had a flat no fly rule, others required a doctor's note and others said as long as you weren't in active labor, they didn't mind.

Thanks...it makes me mad because I start to doubt myself - am I being too much of a prima donna, and then I think no, I'm really not asking for that much. But thanks.

That's a good point. Thankfully, he will be home tomorrow and then I can pick his brain on the subject.

As much as I want Joe to be there for it this time, I think this plan is for the best. I'm so frustrated for you, though! It really shouldn't be this hard.

I am so sorry for all of the roadblocks and frustrations. I hope a solution will be clear.

Thanks, me too. I've been thinking about you and the noodles a lot lately - in general, yes, but also because I can plan and plan and it still might not go how I want. So I want to know that I'll be okay and the baby will be okay if it doesn't go exactly according to plan. And I have no confidence about that right now. Anyway, thanks for the good thoughts.

Thanks! I feel so much more comfortable with this idea already. Hopefully, things will fall into place.