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Bad News: Ellie just wet the bed - my bed. (I changed her and treated the spot and got myself clean sheets.)

God News: In the process of changing the bed, I had to put Frisco in the swing and Ellie in her (rarely used) bed. So, now I have half of a bed all. to. my. self. I sort of wish it was perfectly made with fresh sheets, but I'll take what I've got.

Now, to sleep before anyone wakes up!
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Well, it's not as dull as I remembered it being. I think this is mainly because Frisco is so little that he can really be bent to my schedule. I mean, yeah, it's not all cake, and he does have his moments, but mostly, he's easy. The hardest thing, I think, is that he's never happy at dinnertime so I'm either eating standing or eating sideways, trying not to spill food on him while he's in the Bjorn.

Still, there's not as much time as I remember either. 5:30 to 8:00 is taken up with getting me, Frisco, and Ellie dressed and dropping Ellie off at school. I try to leave the house no later than 3:30 to pick her up. So, I actually only have 7.5 hours - which still sounds like a ton but I bet I spend half of it nursing Frisco or holding him while he sleeps and getting him to sleep.

Speaking of sleep, this week he doesn't like the swing so much and seems to prefer the little bassinet I have. At night, we are doing much better - we are co-sleeping most of the night, although I still get up at least once to nurse him. We can only nurse lying down on my left side so I try to remember to have the right side coincide with a diaper change.

I think Frisco probably weighs over 10 lbs now. He's maybe about the size Ellie was at 2-3 month, although I should go back and check that. Speaking of Ellie, she's been having a hard time. Joe was gone Tuesday to Saturday and left again yesterday afternoon. I think he will be home on Friday. I've been trying to give her lots of extra attention and hugs, but it's hard to do when she's so whiny. The tiniest little thing sets her off and she's so touchy. Not exactly disobedient, but she doesn't respond to correction nearly as well as normal. Of course, she's had to share me 24/7 with Joe being gone and I know that makes it all worse. Her teachers tell me she's been the same way at school.

Then, last night, she went to sleep in her own bed and I woke up around 10:30 with her standing in the closet. I think she might have been looking for the bathroom. I tried to get her into her bed (no luck) and then my bed (no luck) so I actually fell asleep with her slouched against the edge of my bed with her head on my stomach. When I woke up over an hour later, she was still there and when I went to lift her into bed, she was soaked form the waist down and her skin was freezing form the air conditioner. (I assume she was going to the bathroom, got confused, fell asleep, and then had the accident.) I stripped her down and rolled her into bed and covered her up so she got warm. This morning, she woke up happy but started whining pretty quickly. I think we are doing all the right things and I know it will be easier when Joe is here. I just hope all the right things start helping quickly.


Feb. 29th, 2008 08:45 am
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Thanks to everyone for the comments/suggestions/kind words regarding my post from yesterday. I think I've decided to just leave the whole thing alone for the moment.  If anything happens before March 14th, I might do something but for now, I'm just going to hold off.

ION, Ellie slept in her "Cars" bed last night, falling asleep in her own bed for the first time ever.  (Not the cutest picture ever but I had to commemorate the moment.)  Also, Frisco slept for 5 hours in a row!  I win at life!!!

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Recent talk of children not sleeping made me want to share my night last night:

Everything was great until about 2:20 when Frisco woke up.  I got up and nursed him and apparently Joe was awake because he got up to keep me company.  Unfortunately, this woke up Ellie who spent 20 minutes sitting next to me on the couch screaming, "Mommy!" while I nursed Frisco.  With Frisco now asleep, I headed off to bed with Ellie around 3:00 and laid there and cuddled with her until she fell asleep. Of course, as soon as I handed Frisco to Joe, he woke up and started crying his pitiful little newborn cry.  As I lay there with Ellie, I could tell Joe was trying everything to no avail.  Finally, around 3:20, Ellie fell asleep so I got up to tend to Frisco.  As I was getting him settled, Ellie woke up again (she was probably not totally asleep when I left the first time, feeling stressed about getting to Frisco), so to make everyone happy, I just took Frisco to bed and all four of us tried to get some sleep.

Except that Frisco is not big enough yet for us to nurse successfully in the dark so I kept turning the light on to check his latch and so on.  This would prompt Ellie to sit up and see what was going on.  Finally, around 4:00, Ellie was truly asleep and Frisco was fussing/crying, so I got up, changed his diaper, and laid down with him on the couch.  At 4:30, he needed another diaper change so I just gave up and sat out on the couch with him.  I slept there until about 7:30 when Ellie woke up.  Thankfully, my mom got up at the same time and basically ordered me back to bed when I told her about our night.  I rested/slept in bed until around 9:00, when I was awoken by Ellie putting a quarter on my face.  By that time, I felt human again.
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Ellie and my dad are on a plane in Houston right now, waiting to take off and come back to Puerto Rico.  Overall, this trip has been a total success.  My parents loved having Ellie there, she apparently loved being there, and Joe and I really enjoyed the break from parenting.  Also, it seems that Ellie made excellent progress towards sleeping through the night without nursing and we are going to try very hard to maintain that once she gets home.  We have all joked that home will seem boring after visiting Grandma and Grandpa, but my mom also says Ellie is really looking forward to seeing us.

It's weird - I had major misgivings about going from "never spent a night away from mom" to a week away, but it did not appear to bother her at all.  According to my mother, there was no "adjustment" phase or any crying about missing us.  As for me, well,, leaving her at the airport was very hard, but this entire week, I was very happy to know that she was having fun and trying new things.  The first two days were the hardest, but then it got easier.

I think we will try to make this a bi-yearly event - although not next spring because we will be visiting my parents in February when the baby comes and then in May/June while Joe is in Washington.  Still, it's nice to have a small break and know with certainty that Ellie is enjoying herself and being well cared for.

I did have a few insights due to her absence.  First, I knew this, but having a child is the reason our house is always a mess.  It makes me feel better to know that I can still keep a house organized and clean, but that it is the little tornado living here that makes it impossible.  It's not just that she makes messes, but caring for her takes up that time that I might otherwise use to just straighten up.

Second, being pregnant is not what it wearing me down - it is being pregnant and caring for Ellie while working full time.  I think I could do two of the three just fine, but it's that third one that means I'm exhausted at the end of the day.

Third, I was always one of those people who thought of my dogs as kids.  I have no problem with people who refer to their dogs as their kids and I can see why they do it.  However, it really hit me this week, when we had just dogs and no kid, that dogs are about a thousand times easier than kids.  You walk them, feed them, and pet them occasionally, and they are happy.   And if you want to run out for dinner or to get coffee or something, they just stay at the house.

Finally, before Ellie left, she was nursing basically just at bedtime/naptime and if she woke in the night (which happened maybe 3 nights a week).  I was very sore from nursing while pregnant and there's no milk left.  Also, my brain knows that Ellie will like her baby brother better if she's not still nursing when he comes.  Despite all that, my heart is a little bit sad that I may have nursed her for the last time.  I guess I should focus on being glad that we got to nurse for two and a half years.  When we started, I had absolutely no idea how much it would mean to me.  I thought about it a lot the week before she left, so it's not like it's unexpected for me.  I didn't talk to Ellie about it, which I now regret, but I didn't think about it after she left.  Still, my mom said she didn't ask to nurse when I wasn't there and Joe is going to take over bedtime for a week or two here.  I'm hoping it's just me that will have to make the emotional adjustment and that Ellie is ready.  If she's just not ready, she can still nurse, but I'd like to avoid that. 

Well, my dad just called - the plane is due to take off in a few minutes.  Oh the coolest part of their return trip - because of my job, I have a airport ID badge that I've never used but it's supposed to let me in anywhere in the airport.  So, Joe and I are going to try to meet them at the gate.  I can't wait to see her!


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